Having dry eyes from crying again, wonder hw much tear I've shed in total for the wk.

When I was young, I was ignorant, I didnt understand the importance of education and scoring good grades. Whenever I do badly for my tests or exams, my parents would get angry with me. They scold me, I cry. So when I was young, studying was just to avoid the scoldings and maybe earn some rewards from my parents.

Now, I'm eighteen. I'm much more sensible, no longer that ignorant, I've learned to study for myself, for my own future. I give myself stress and get upset when I dont do well. I dont wish to receive any scoldings or whatever when I do not meet expectations, cos they'll just make me feel worse. I want encouragements, not naggings, neither scoldings. I'm old enough to know what I'm doing.

So dad, please, I dont wanna be treated like a kid anymore. I have my own feelings, I feel awful bout it too. I dont need you to add oil to the fire.

Feeling so down. Yet not everyone understands how I'm feeling right now. Emotionally unstable, feeling that any tiny thing could trigger my tear glands. I've never felt so terrible about my results before. A levels are nearing, yet I'm still doing so horrendously. I tried so hard to buck up with my Chem and Phy cos I failed them last yr, yet nw they're the only 2 subjects I passed. I just couldnt balance all the subjects, how dumb of me.

I'm so not alright, so please, dont agitate me further. I guess I just need some quiet time, alone.

GUO MINGCONG KAMNUAN, YOU BETTER SEE THIS!!

HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY! (:

Aye my dear sister, u should really be honoured that I'm doing this for u, despite u being how "nice" to me and forgetting my bday til 2 days ltr!!!

I havent seen u for quite some time alr! We havent been updating each other much, I rmb the last time we met we didnt update much cos we missed out too many things we didnt know what to talk abt. ur fault la who ask u go poly our schedules so different nw! ): I missed the days we went out tgt, it's so rare to have a gd platonic friend of an opposite gender, I'm so proud of our friendship!! (:

Hope u had an enjoyable 18th, sister! Heheeeee. We really need to meet up soon!

And to continue my outdated post-term exams update. LOL.

Thursday, 10/3/2011

Sentosa with Chris, my post bday celebration! I had a full day sponsorship!! :D

His present was darn cute, a globe of assorted things which looked kinda funny when put tgt. HAHAHA.

Lunched at Yewtee Point Subway, then met Jin outside his house to collect something before heading to Sentosa.

Decided to play in Siloso beach, it rained quite a bit aft we reached the place. Walked towards the Underwater World, saw a man with snakes offering ppl to take pics with the snake for a ridiculously priced $6. We felt the snake skin bt didnt take pics with it cos they're so gross omg it took me so much courage to even touch it eeeeee.

I had an airbrush tattoo, it lasted for 3 days cos I didnt take care of it when it was supposed to last for a wk or 2. Lol! The woman who helped me with the tattoo laughed at me when I said I wanted the one with the design of a beach cos she said no one chose tt design. Tsk, so embarrassing!

Had some snack at Delifrance while waiting for the rain to stop before playing in the beach. Hoho beach was fun, playing with stones and sand and water... LOL!

Dinner in Holland's Thai Express, then homed. Haha awesomez day enjoyed myself so much!!! (:

Friday, 11/3/2011

Lovin, Danielle and I went to Jasmine's to play! :D

Pizzahut delivery for lunch, then we played Kinect. Played some rockband game, I scored 99% for monotonous singing, nt bad right!!! Hahaha! I've gt natural talent 8) Hehe! And thr was the dancing game and sports game, had a fun time playing hehe.

And the class girls bought me shades from Cotton On and body wash from The Body Shop, which they cleverly forgot to remove the price tag bt nvm, LOL! Love my presents, thanks girls! (:

We watched Black Swan online, it wasnt as marvelous as people described, prolly cos of the high expectations I had on it. Bt nvm, it wasnt tt bad either! (:

Homed aft tt. Hoho fun post exam days! (:

Back from Malaysia! :D

Ohhhhhhh trainings were insaneeee!! I'm aching all over! We've gt 2 sessions of trainings per day except for the first and last days. The first ever training was bomb. They made us do 20 times of squat stretch squat stretch thing (Idk what's it called) and 20 times of star jumps while waiting for our turns for multiples. Wth we didnt even get much time to rest cos it'd alr be our turn aft we finished those jumpings. Mad. We ended up doing lesser and lesser of the jumpings, then eventually stopped them cos we really couldnt jump anymore.

The subsequent trainings seemed to be less intense, probably cos we were slowly adapting to the tough trainings thr. Bt still, muscle aches were killing us, it was difficult to even walk properly. And thr never failed to be physical trainings aft each training.

Thr were 2 games session, the first one sucked like mad, cos I kept making mistakes and my legs couldnt quite move thanks to the aches. The second one was much btr (: The players thr are soooooo much btr than us, their girls can win our guys, their 14 year olds can win us ): Their perseverance in the sport is really admirable, if I were to train like that for a month I'd probably be unable to endure such intensity.

We did a CIP in the orphanage! But it was only for an hour! ): And the kids prefer the guys to girls, prolly cos they can carry them and run ard with them, and cos thr're more guys than girls, thr werent much to do for us girls other than talking to the quiet girls lol. But I still enjoyed my time thr, at least I got to play some games with the guys and interact with the girls (:

Food thr was awesome! I never fail to make myself full every meal! Hahahaha. Big fish big meat every day, super shiok! :D Hotel was great too, it's quite a posh hotel, very comfortable to stay in! (: Life was like heaven, having gd food and having ppl to serve me. HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Now, smacked back to reality, I've gt to unpack my luggage and chiong my tutorials, what shit. I actually miss Malaysia!!!

Post term exams is fun fun fun! :D

Lovin told me that Birthday lasts for 15 days, it's kinda true this time! HAHAHA! Okay, mine lasted for 5 actually.

School on Monday and Tuesday were shit, cos I had paperssss. Shall start my updates from the Woohooooooo Wednesday! (:

Wednesday, 9/3/2011
Rejoice the end of terms! :D

Lunched at some Japanese Restaurant in Ion with Lovin, Danielle, Jasmine, Grace, Jerald, Yuhao, Blim, Hans and Kenny. The food wasnt nice! ): Jerald gave me half his char siew cos they're all fats. Lol. And we played guess the number game with the rest of the fats, seasoned with chilli powder and garlic flakes. Thankfully I didnt get any of those, they look so gross though they said it actually tasted quite nice. Omg.

I bought a casing and 3 screen protectors for my darling, which costed me $58.90, holy shit. Bt still happy tt it's protected nw! (:

Lovin, Danielle, Jasmine and I went Cine and wasted our money to watch "How Do You Know". Gosh it's the suckiest movie I've watched, I dont get the movie, except for the main gist of it. And thr wasnt any climax in the movie, it was oh-so-boring!! I thought I was the only one, bt aft looking ard the cinema, I'm sure others feel the same way too, cos thr were even ppl slping. I wasted $6.50, wts.

Far East for hair cut, hoho I love my new hair, so much neater!! (:

Met Mewleng after that, we're supposed to meet Chilanan too for "No Strings Attached", bt cos of some stupid communication error Chilanan didnt come in the end, and our NSA date was postponed. Damn. Had dinner with Mewleng at Superdog (They've gt super awesome sausages (L)), took a few pics and tried out her phone camera effects. Hoho!

THIS IS EPIC!!!

HAHAHAHAHAA!!!

K I gtg, shall update more some other time, bt idk when, cos I'll be off to Msia for Badm training trip tmr!!! Yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! (Y)!!!

School drove me crazy. Haha I looked like a guy right I know (: Last paper tmr, awesomezszxszxsz!!! :D

I feel the need to blog despite not studying for my Math term exam tmr.

I admit school was boring. Hw fun can sch be when thr're 2 papers to take right...

But after school was (L)!!!

Thank you Mewleng for meeting Darren and asking him to pass the present to me! Hoho colourful colourful "biography" of glutton Xinyi! U must have put in so much time and effort in it, decorating every single page of the "book" with different designs! Thank you thank you I really appreciate it a lot! (L)!

Thank you Xuewei for asking Darren to pass your present to me too! Hahaha it feels so great to receive 2 presents at a time early in the morning, although those were the only presents I got til evening... Lol! Love your stickys I'm gonna eat them til I go boh geh! Lololol! Cya soon!!! (L)!

Thank you Chris for accompanying me all the way from school to Lakeside then to IMM then make u go all the way back to Lakeside!!! And u didnt talk much cos u were so tired and stuff and I was so busy talking to Xuemiao! Sorry and thank you once again! (L)!

Thank you Xuemiao for your stack of photographs with messages written behind every piece of them!! Seriously touching you're really sweet you rmbed so many things that I've alr forgotten!!! And u sacrificed ur Econs test for me, awwwwwww! :') Thanks best bud for spending time with me on my special day, although it's just doing simple stuff like buying stuff for ur camera! It's really delightful to see u aft quite some time! (L)!

Thank you Xinying, Chilanan and Kovasky for the Birthday dinner, Xinying especially, for organising the dinner and treating me, and buying me the cake and giving me tt Birthday card!!! Hahahaha so funny I thought thr'd be a msg behind bt I flipped it over to see nothing. Hoho but it was really nice I liked it it's gonna remain in my wallet, be honoured!!! (: Thank you Chilanan for the card u wrote with my pen beside me, elephant and giraffe stuck tgt at the backside huh, LOL! And Kovasky u too, for coming aft ur training and celebrating the day with me! (: Thank you darlings dinner was really really great! (L) (L) (L)!!!

Thank you 2SB6 girls for just accompanying me! (: Life would suck being a lonely Birthday freak!!! :D

Last but not least, thank you everyone who wished me, whether in person, SMS or even Facebook! Y'all made my day! (:

I love my friends, they make me feel so loved! :D

Time to sleep! And wake up early in the morning to study!!! Oh gosh I must succeed this time or I'm seriously gonna flunk Math and Chem!!!

PS: Today, I'm eighteen. It's a significant day. I'm legal for many many things. I made many many wishes before blowing the candle. Greedy greedy me, hope all my wishes come true! (: